1.29.2008

give me a Valium and Super Wal-Mart

i think that if you ask any American housewife what her least favorite errand to run is, i am almost certain that she would say going to the grocery store. and since i am currently working as An-American-Housewife-In-Training (oh, you thought i was an au pair? that just takes care of children? silly you), i have decided that i also HATE going to the grocery store.

back when God was creating the heavens and the earth and the days of the week, He decided that Mondays should be a universally hated day. He succeeded in this, and now, even on the other side of the world in a job that i don't have to put on heels or makeup for, drive to work in a panic or sit at a computer all day, i still hate Mondays. read my previous blog to get a rundown of what an average day looks like for me. now, add taking the kids to school, going to the grocery store AND the dry cleaners in there...somewhere. that is my Monday.

so, every Monday Annelie gives me a grocery list, and every Monday i make the trek to the Lidingö Centrum to purchase said groceries. and all i can say is....America DEFINITELY has a leg up on Sweden in the food shopping industry.

i'm guessing that everybody in our town waits until Monday mornings to go grocery shopping, because every Monday morning when i arrive at the Centrum, there is a line of about 8 cars all trying to get into the parking lot. the Centrum is not THE grocery store, it's the center that holds the grocery store, along with the ever-present H&M, post office, liquor store, etc. the grocery store is one very small, tiny part of the Centrum. emphasis on small and tiny.

i think i've decided that most Swedish families (possibly all Europeans, cause i've seen this in Paris...right, Connie? and evidently in my mind Swedes and Frenchies constitute all of Europe) go to the grocery store on a daily basis to buy their food, rather than making two trips a month, like most people in America. when you walk into the grocery store here (the name of it is Vi...weird, right?), the carts are tucked away in a back corner next to the registers, so you have to enter into the exit of the store in order to get a cart. they only put the little baskets next to the entrance. since i am shopping for a family of FIVE, i need more than a tiny basket.

so i get my cart and off i go...and here's my random observations:

* the bread is at the BEGINNING of the store, so that when you throw your loaves into your
cart they inevitably are smushed and cold from having the frozen hamburgers and milk thrown on them
* every Monday i purchase around 6 or 7 cartons of milk because, for some unknown reason, they come in little cartons here rather than the gallon jugs. and since there's 5 people in the family, and these 5 people require 3 different varieties, that equals lots of milk
* there are only 2 aisles of the "freezer section", and a HUGE (okay, comparatively huge) produce section
* there's only about 4 aisles of dry/canned goods. take an average aisle at the grocery store in America, cut in half and put them back-to-back, and that would be the size of one aisle here
* there's about 3 aisles dedicated solely to candy

so, after i've done all my shopping i get to the check out lanes, which i think is the part that everyone around the world hates. but believe me, if anybody has reason to hate it, it's ME. people in America, here is my advice for you: BE THANKFUL FOR 18 CHECKOUT LANES. because here in Sweden, there is five. FIVE checkout lanes. this isn't usually a bad thing cause, like i said, most people here are buying their groceries for the night's dinner, rather than a week's supply of food for five people, like me.

i haul my cart that's packed to the top full of food into the shortest lane, and then proceed to unload all the groceries onto the belt, which is about 10 centimeters long. i pick up about 7 bags because YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR THEM HERE and then run down to the other end to bag them all as they're being scanned. this is by FAR my least favorite part of shopping - paying and bagging the groceries. i always have an insane amount of groceries, and people are always staring at me cause i look like i've just bought out the store's entire supply of milk and bread. but i bag my groceries and go, and here's my second least-favorite part of grocery shopping:

THE EVIL CARTS. someone thought it would be a great idea to make the carts have wheels that turn a full circle, but really, this just makes me want to steer my cart into the nearest parked car. there is no sense of control at all with them, and yet, i appear to be the only person in Sweden who is unable to maneuver them. i see 85 year old women easily pushing their carts along. why do i have such a hard time?? i don't know.

do you now see why i hate grocery shopping? it is the bane of my existence these days. so, to make us all feel better over my misfortune, here's some pretty pictures for your enjoyment:


the top photo was taken at the Opera House (operahuset)
the bottom photo was taken in Stockholm overlooking the Baltic Sea

3 comments:

Annie said...

God Bless Super Target and their 32 check out lanes.

connie said...

Hey, do you have a camera phone? I think I will take some pics of Proxi with it so that people can really understand the size factors of said "tiny store".

Anonymous said...

So I don't hate grocery shopping yet... but MAN if I was where you are... Seriously... I would most definitely dread it.. awe man. :)
~Natalie Rivest